About The Studette

A Studette is independent, smart, strong, outgoing, passionate, and provocative in all manner of ways. She doesn't need a man but she wants one...or two or three. If a man who behaves as she does is called a STUD, then she is STUDETTE!! She has control of her life (for the most part) and who she chooses to share that life with at any given time. Studettes UNITE and tear down the double standard! Join our Facebook® group and bring on the discussion! For more information on what is Studette, please see related links.

This Is Why We Do It

This needs to stop:

A 20 year old Indian woman got beheaded by her father because he didn’t like her lifestyle choices. He paraded her head through the village before turning himself in to authorities.  The AP story points out the clash of rural Indian morals with modern life.

Even though the Studette website description and home page plainly state what our Studette message and intent is, I still get people who think it’s all about sex or how awesome I am. While I agree with the latter, our real intent is to get conversations started to help change the double standard of acceptable behavior of men compared to how a woman is “supposed” to behave. Women shouldn’t be dead because of their lifestyle choices, ever.

It is very sad commentary that it took me two seconds to find a recent story of atrocity against a woman based on her lifestyle choices. My own encounters with the duplicity of men slut shaming women has been confined to name calling and feeling less of a person. I still have my head. It is our intent and purpose in life to make sure all women keep their heads and use them however they see fit without prejudice.

You can help us in this endeavor by talking to your friends, calling out the double standard when you see or hear it and just being real with yourself and others around you on the subject. We will know we’ve made a difference when a woman can fuck or love whoever she pleases (responsibly, of course. Serial heartbreakers are bad, mmkay?) and no one says one thing against her.

Tell us what you think. What will happen first, equal pay or equal sexual treatment? How long do you think it will be before this site is unnecessary? With all the crazy laws trying to regulate women’s reproductive rights in the United States, we think we’re in it for the long haul. Unfortunately.


Meet My Daughter, Vagina

By now most people have heard of the Michigan House Rep who plainly stated that the lawmakers attention to her vagina was flattering but unwelcome. She got banned for that statement apparently specifically because of the use of the word vagina. You know, the scientific term for “down there” and without which there would be no human life on the planet. That vagina.

Dick is a proper name, right? No one gets their feathers ruffled if you say, “Hello, Dick!!” or “Put that right here, Dick!”.  Every time I hear the name Dick, I think of a penis. While it might just me that thinks penis every single time I hear the name Dick, I think we can, nay, should make Vagina a proper name, too. It would take some of the unfamiliarity and apparent icky-ness away from it, not like every human wasn’t actually up in it at some point but you know, some people are sensitive about from whence they came.

I pity the child named Vagina, though. Can you imagine? My daughter would have to tell people why her name is Vagina. “My mother named me Vagina so that it would be as acceptable in society as Dick”. That would suck. Don’t make me name my daughter Vagina. Please.

Video of the vagina incident:

Raising the Teen Studette

It was brought to my attention recently that I am a Studette. I always knew there was something about me that was a little different from all the “other girls,” but I couldn’t quite put a name to it. I love words like “succulent,” “juicy,” “erotic,” and “powerful.” I like to behave in a manner that tends to intrigue men. I love eye contact. And I happen to enjoy sex. Very much. I’ve been able to take the most innocuous comments and turn them into something suggestive or sexual very easily from the time I was a young teen growing up on the west coast. I just never knew others like me, and I certainly didn’t know what to call myself. The word is “Studette.”

I have also recently noticed some striking similarities between my early teen self and my teenage daughter. She too has some rather advanced knowledge for her age. It finally occurred to me that she is a budding Studette herself. This brought about a certain near-panic in me, but being the Studette I am, I have calmed down and am putting my mind to the question of how to raise a Studette in Training.

First and foremost, there are safety issues. We adult women have generally addressed these issues and can take care of ourselves. But when you are raising a daughter who is much like yourself, it’s important to be sure she understands safety. Having worked for several years as a nurse in the women’s health care setting, many of these issues have been discussed with both of my daughters from a young age. The obvious ones are protection from disease and pregnancy. Having a thirteen year old patient with a new baby makes one quick to review these sorts of facts with your own daughters. Protection like this is a no-brainer, so I won’t really elaborate here. The trick is to speak honestly and openly with your daughter. Other dangers, however, come to mind as well. I’ve discussed with my girls not accepting a drink from someone you don’t know very well, especially if you didn’t see that person pour/make the drink. Various drugs are out there and are still in use. Another danger is that of getting involved with someone who has violent tendencies. For both the adult woman and the teen girl, I believe it’s important to know a little about your partner, or potential partner. I personally enjoy the intimacy involved with sex at least as much as the act itself, so getting to know that potential partner is paramount with me.

One thing I think is of utmost consideration is to raise your daughter in a way that empowers her. A Studette is not just about being sexy, but about being confident, free-thinking, and empowered. A girl should not grow up with the “slut” stereotype, but should learn to be expressive and self-assured. Praise her successes, and help her through the downfalls. Be there for her. Listen to her with an open mind. Teach her how to make good choices. Most of all, love her with all your heart.

Finally!!! More about ME!!!!

Originally written Dec 4, 2006:

Having been recently divorced and putting myself “out there” on the internet has forced me to write a lot of things “About Me” and “Who I’d Like to Meet”. It has been kind of cathartic and forced me to answer some really basic questions about myself that I hadn’t given any thought to in quite some time.

In this rumination of mine I have discovered that it’s very difficult to pin me down. I could talk about me today but that could very well change tomorrow. I am ever evolving, always becoming, constantly changing and forever learning, adapting and growing. Those are my constants. That’s who I am.

Now that’s not to say that my core values of honesty, compassion, discovery, reason and love of laughter change on a frequent basis, but rather how new events and changes in my life are affected by those core values to add to the evolution of me.

SHREK: For your information, there’s a lot more to ogres than people think.
DONKEY: Example?
SHREK: Example? Okay, um, ogres are like onions.
DONKEY: [Sniffs] They stink?
SHREK: Yes. No!
DONKEY: They make you cry?
DONKEY: You leave them out in the sun, they get all brown, start sprouting’ little white hairs.
SHREK: No! Layers! Onions have layers! Ogres have layers! Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers. [Sighs]
DONKEY: Oh, you both have layers. Oh. [Sniffs] You know, not everybody likes onions. Cake! Everybody loves cakes! Cakes have layers.
SHREK: I don’t care… what everyone likes. Ogres are not like cakes.
DONKEY: You know what else everybody likes? Parfaits. Have you ever met a person, you say, “Let’s get some parfait,” they say, “Hell no, I don’t like no parfait”? Parfaits are delicious.
SHREK: No! You dense, irritating, miniature beast of burden! Ogres are like onions! End of story. Bye-bye. See ya later.

I love that movie…..and now back to my story….

I am not the car I drive nor the job I have. I can not be fully defined by the friends I have nor by my family. Although I wouldn’t mind a bit being evaluated with friends and family in mind…they’re all awesome! I’ve lived in many different places in the world, but I am not defined by that either. I am a conglomeration of all those things and so much more unseen and inside and sometimes none of it.

Are you confused yet? Or do you “get” it?

Did you notice there’s nothing about God leading me in my life or me turning to God for guidance or being shaped by Him? That’s because God is inside us all, God is US. We are all made of the same stuffs, not just homo sapiens but everything everywhere is made of the same original stuff that was at one point all one really, really, really, really dense ball of matter. Sorry but the God of the Christian bible (or any other “Bible” for that matter) is not included in my core beliefs. I have no faith where that extremely contradictory work of fiction to control society is concerned. To say that we are all created by some omniscient being is far too simple an answer for this beautiful and wonderfully complex universe. Love to talk about it all though, anytime, anywhere.

So that’s “About Me”, now what do I like? Well, the usual stuff actually. You know…fine dining, wine tasting, artsy fartsy stuff, live acoustic music, moonlit walks on the beach, meeting up with 39 other people at a designated time and virtual place to kill monsters and explore dungeons, you know…the basics. Other activities I like are rollerblading, bowling and putt-putt golf. My interests include rational and irrational thinking, getting in touch with my spiritual side, science fiction, astronomy, genetics, philosophy, theology, ancient history and laughing a lot.

I’m interested in finding and meeting co-creators, collaborators, co-conspirators, co-producers, teachers, and travelers to share in this epic adventure called life, friends mostly. Friends are where it should always begin. Now if we happen to get naked from time to time that’s ok too. (just checking to see who actually read this….LOL)

Hi, my name is Katie. I’m 39 years old, recovering addict to World of Warcraft (Stormreaver, 60 Pally, Aremana, Malicious Guild), recently divorced and living alone for the first time in my life.

Three Years and Three Days

As originally written on Dec 26, 2006:

I just finished having one of those weekends you read about in romance novels. I feel like I just lived an entire lifetime in the past three days. It was meaningful, beautiful and life altering in almost every way.

It was Christmas three years ago when I first met Lorenzo. I was at Olympia after my company holiday party and was having a good time with friends there when I noticed a quite handsome young man that kept looking at me. It took him about a half hour but he finally asked me to dance and we started talking.

We both felt a strong attraction to one another but in relationships, timing is everything…we were both married albeit not happily. So we lost each other for three years. I had often thought of him and “what it would have been like if” but never really thought I’d see him again. Until, of course, I did.

This time when our eyes met the ember of a fire that had been sparked so long ago came into full blaze. That didn’t stop me from reaching into my purse to get a business card…I was damn sure not letting him get away without my number this time!!
We stayed together from the time our eyes met until the time when I had to see him leave again. But in that time I lived another lifetime and knew real unadultered love again and it was good. Really good. So of course it couldn’t last.

Lorenzo is from Albania. He came to America by way of Greece where he had lived for ten years. He speaks three languages fluently and can understand many others. He is gentle and kind and has some of finest friends I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. But Lorenzo is young, only 29, and still making his way. Right now, he is making his way working as an alaskan crab fisher, apparently one of your more dangerous occupations. He is on the boat for months at a time and I will not see him again for maybe six months.
I just wanted to share my “Affair to Remember” as it was truly a dream and magic from start to finish. It is funny how life works.

Some pictures are on my page.

Another fitting Poem by David John Lucas

Harbor of Power

What finds us here is desire
A quench for internal fires
Some burning, some a glowing ember
Some for lust, some seeking forever

My heart has been my loudest voice
The one to hear it is the only choice
Surrender my quest to the angels of fate
They place us together, my hearts only mate.

Our ships finally passing, our anchors finally touch
Our harbor finally realized within each others love.
In our power and glory seen only to roam apart
Each ruling a domain with a presence so stout

Provide me this retreat where comfort melds with passion
In the company of each other each in a discreet fashion

We let down our guards in knowing each others power
In this private union strenth so soft as the petal of a flower.
Knowing each others fears and feats never needs spoken.
In this retreat we live and love with time and the world frozen.
We part to return to each our majestic patrols
Refreshed, alive and in complete control.

David John Lucas

Copyright ©2002 David John Lucas

Note added June 5, 2012 – Studettes can fall hard for the wrong guy. Didn’t take me long to get over the, “Why you no clean?” and “Why you no cook?” constant comments but it was SO worth it. 


How to Get Your Family Kicked Off an Island Paradise

So yeah, as a young and horny Studette, I lived on a beautiful island paradise. I was seventeen, tan and fit. And I wanted ALL the hot guys. So I had them, mostly.

I had been living on the island with my family for about two and half years. I went back state side on my vacation and when I returned my family went to Hawaii for two weeks for their vacation. So there I was: no parents, no chaperone, just all on my own in the most beautiful tropical setting. I had the TIME OF MY LIFE!

Until I locked myself out of the house that is.

I called the appropriate authorities to come unlock my door but I didn’t realize that I had to BE there in order for them to do it; so I went to a basketball game and watched hot, sweaty men play all night. Then after the game, instead of going home well before curfew like a good girl would have, I went to the bachelor’s quarters to play the game of menage a trios with a couple of the basketball players, one of each color for diversity sake.

Unfortunately for me the chief of the local excuse for police saw me sitting on the steps outside the entrance to the BQ. A place a seventeen year old girl is NOT supposed to be. I went in anyway.

I won’t bore you with all the steamy details; unless you beg me to. Suffice to say it was three hours of good clean fun, except when I had to go to the bathroom and the white guy was all like, “But I just got it back up!” and I’m like, “Do you you want me to pee on it?”. Three hours that put me going home well past curfew and of course when I arrived home my door was still locked.

I biked down to the nearest phone and called security again. This time I was at the house when they arrived, but those guys were pretty smart and deduced I had not been at home the entire time. I got a ticket for being out after curfew.

The next day the chief dude put one and two together and the shit hit the fan. My parents were called, my dad’s boss was called and I was called down to the security station. They wanted to ask me all sorts of questions about who else I might have seen while I was there and other such stuff. Since I had already paid my ticket, they couldn’t really pursue anything as they had no actual evidence I was in there.

Unfortunately, my Dad’s company was going through lay offs and my Dad’s boss thought it was a good enough excuse to add him to the list. Boss man called me at 6:00 am a couple days later to tell me I was being sent to my parents in Hawaii. I had a good time there too but that’s another story.

When we all returned home, boss man gave my Dad the lay off news and we had two weeks to pack up and leave the island. The most ironic thing of this whole story is that while my Dad is sitting there having to listen to what a wayward girl he has, he’s remembering the time he and his daughter were in the BQ together visiting my boyfriend, who happened to be none other than his boss’s son.

I’d had the pleasure of both of his sons as a matter of fact. I am Studette after all.

More Sexploits Coming Soon